Margaret Cali: How Do We Begin to Make the Emotional Load of IVF More Visible?
Margaret Cali, IVF Readiness Integration Strategist, shared on LinkedIn:
”IVF has a treatment plan.
It also has an emotional workload.
The medical side is visible.
- Appointments.
- Medication.
- Procedures.
- Results.
- Decisions.
But some of what a woman carries through treatment may be much less visible.
- The disappointment of what has already happened.
- The uncertainty of what comes next.
- The effort of continuing to function.
- The pressure of decisions.
- The strain treatment may place on work, relationships and everyday life.
Research into patient-centred fertility care recognises physical and emotional burden as part of the treatment experience, alongside effectiveness, time, cost and risk. ESHRE guidance also recognises the importance of understanding patients’ psychosocial needs across the fertility-treatment pathway.
That matters because a woman can look informed, organised and prepared for IVF while still carrying a great deal underneath.
I call this The Quiet Load of IVF.
It is not a diagnosis.
It does not mean she is not coping.
And it does not imply that her emotional state determines whether treatment will work.
It is simply a way of making visible some of the emotional experience that can sit alongside the medical process.
So how do we begin to make that emotional load more visible in practice?
Sometimes it starts with three simple questions:
- What are you already carrying?
- What feels heaviest right now?
- What support would help at this stage?
Not every answer requires an intervention.
Sometimes being asked is significant in itself.
For those working in fertility care:
How does your team make space for what a patient may be carrying emotionally before or during treatment?
For those interested in the evidence base, ESHRE’s guidance on routine psychosocial care in infertility and medically assisted reproduction is available here.”
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